Dance Recital "Put on a Happy Face"

About a month ago the girls had their final dance performance at the city's big concert hall.  We went the day before for a practice, and the girls had a great time putting on their costume and getting on stage.  On Friday evening we all went to watch them perform.  They were particularly excited that they got to wear a little make-up, but from my perspective, why does prep for that kind of thing always take 3x longer than anticipated?  We got their hair washed, brushed, pulled into tight ponytails, costumes on, make-up on, shoes gathered up, etc.  And finally we dropped them off and got to sit in the nice air-conditioned auditorium and enjoy the show. 

They did great.  One girl in their class just stood like a statue the entire time (glad I wasn't her mom) but Mila and Siena seemed to be enjoying themselves.  After the show Hyrum gave them each a rose.  As we walked back to the car Mila kept asking, "Is this from you and Papa?  Thank you so much! It's beautiful." 

The music the girls danced to was "Put on a Happy Face" and they got to wear their tap shoes.  One thing I realized by watching the hour-long performance is that some kids have natural talent, but most kids don't.  There were 2-3 of the older kids who were actually enjoyable to watch and the rest were just going through the actions.  It makes me want to get my kids involved in an array of activities so I can see where they really shine instead of just paying to keep them in one thing where they may never excel. 

Mila & Siena turn 4

Unfortunately I didn't win Mom-of-the-year award for the girls' birthday celebration.  On the one hand, they're young and don't know better.  On the other hand, it was kind of lame.  I was just feeling burned out with life in general, so I didn't put a lot of mental energy into making something elaborate.

After we dropped Tiago off at school, I took them to Chikfila because I felt last minute like they needed some special activity.  Then we had a family dinner and ate cake and opened presents.  

I bought a cake mold off Amazon a few weeks before, because they had the cutest pictures of unicorn cakes.  But once I baked the cake, though, and began decorating I soon realized my cake would be the 'pinterest fail' version of what I saw on Amazon.  It took entirely too long, I lose steam easily on projects like that, and the colors were way more neon than intended.

But on their birthday morning I showed them the cake and they thought it was the best thing ever.  Whenever someone asked them what they were doing for their birthday, they responded that they had a unicorn cake.  

So even if they didn't have a spectacular birthday celebration, they really thought that half-ugly unicorn cake was the best thing ever!

(Their gift this year was scooters.  I saw them at Target, came home and researched other options, and when I went back a week later intending to buy them at full price they were 50% off.  That was really awesome.)

Mila & Siena update

I want to remember a few things about this stage the girls are in:

-We almost never use the stroller anymore.  (Who thought that day would come?! not me.)  Occasionally we'll use it to go for a walk, but they usually jump out at some point and leave me pushing an empty double stroller.  When we go to the gym or the store, they just hold my hand walking in, and then wander freely inside.  They LOVE holding Tiago's hand.  

-Another milestone is that they act like they like each other.  And they're protective of each other (when they're not busy pulling hair and pushing... the hair pulling has slowed down, hopefully coming to an end.)  A few weeks ago in their gymnastics class, a little girl took the circle mat Mila was sitting on.  Mila threw a fit and tried to get it back, and Siena immediately came to her rescue, throwing a fit, too.  It was quite the uprising.

-Princesses!! The girls started reading some of my old Disney books and are obsessed with princesses.  Siena is particularly enamored.  When we were playing at the library, she wandered over to the magazines, found a kid magazine with Cinderella on the cover, and sat reading it for several minutes.  They are utilizing the dress-up clothes they got for Christmas, often requesting to be "Barbie", "Sofia", or "Cinderella."  (Although they pronounce it "pincerella".  Another funny pronunciation they have is "Seepy Booty" for Sleeping Beauty.  

-In general, they're talking quite a bit.  A lot of what Mila says is gibberish still, but when they really want to communicate they can.  Two funny things Siena says frequently are grabbing my face or touching my hair with both hands and saying "Boo-diful".  And making dramatic statements like, "This sooo heavy!" (a small empty box) or "He soo funny!"  Mila likes to have conversations (much of which I don't understand) but it makes her smile so big to be talking.  

-I don't remember their first words (shame on me) but I remember about 6 months ago, before they were saying much more than "Mama" and "Papa", I bought a huge box of fruit snacks at Costco.  I kept them in the pantry (which has a thing on the handle so the kids can't go in).  One morning I saw Siena pounding on the pantry door saying "foot snacks" over and over.  I thought, "She can't really be saying that..."  But maybe that was her first real words!  I think I've written this before, but she also pronounced her name "Si-nena", and still kind of does. 

-They know who they are now!  If they're at day care and someone asks, "Who is Mila?"  They correctly identify themselves.  If you ask their names, they can tell you.  This is huge!  Because previously, if I didn't tell the adults present who was who, no one knew.  (They even would claim to both be Mila.)  Tiago still can't really tell them apart, but he also doesn't ever try.  We've noticed he just refers to them as "The girls."  Or individually, "That girl."  I'm trying to help him realize they are different, and have names.  

-They went about 2 months without napping (back in April/May/June) and all of a sudden they're back to long naps every afternoon.  I think they stopped napping while they were teething, plus they were in the same room and kept each other up with their talking.  I tried separating them during nap time (with a pack&play in Tiago's room) and it's kind of been a miracle.  I almost don't even know what to do with myself in the afternoon.  Mila is SO good about just laying down, drinking her milk and falling asleep. I don't even hear a noise from her room.  Siena is more problematic, crying out 3 or 4 times for help  ("Papa!!!"  Or "More milk!!"  Or telling me she needs her diaper changed.)  But eventually she falls asleep too.  It makes for a little bit later bed time, but it's a fair trade off for happier kids. 

-Siena is kind of obsessed with Hyrum.  The first night he was gone at a training after coming home from deployment Siena laid in her crib at night whimpering and saying, "Want Papa!"  She pointed to the door asking for him.  We go through a similar routine almost every night he's not here.  (Way too many.)

-They like to carry their blankets all over.  Yes, plural.  As babies they never really had an attachment to blankets. They had so many that I put two in each crib to see if they'd take to one.  (I did that with Tiago, and he became obsessed with his blue one.)  But now the girls are just obsessed with two blankets each.  They used to be in the cribs only, but now they pull them out and drag them around the house. 

-They love to sing!  And always have.  But now they can actually sing the words to several songs.  Their favorite is "Child of God."  They also like Silent Night, If you're Happy and you know it Clap your Hands, the mouse song from Cinderella, all of Mary Poppins, and Hi-Ho from Snow White.  Their nursery leader loves them for it.

-I'll end with one of my least favorite phrases of the moment, "Hold you!!"  (Which really means hold me.)  They say it all the time.  And I tell them, "No, I'm not going to hold you."  I try to just hold them when I'm sitting down, but it also happens in public when they're screaming and I'm trying to calm them down or listen to something.  When Hyrum wants to drive me crazy he just starts saying, "Hold you! Hold you!"  

Pictures of Siena (she was completely naked, but I cropped because this is the internet!)

Pictures of Mila, making one of her favorite faces

Mothering 3 toddlers

I've often thought about the differences in having a full-time career vs being a full-time SAHM.  In my experience, the biggest difference is how I feel stress.  Working full-time, I felt a constant level of stress from 8 am until 5:30 pm.  There were notable good and mad moments mixed in, but the stress level was just a general constant.  As a mom to newborns, I remember thinking the stress went up and down throughout the day.  I had a few hours of a baby sleeping on my chest, feeling totally relaxed, then a rush of stress trying to pump, feed babies, and entertain a toddler all at the same time. Then restful nap time, followed by the stress of trying to get three kids down the stairs, into their car seats, and through the grocery store before needing to be fed again.  Over and over.

I often hear other twin moms (with newborns) ask hopefully, "Does it get easier??"  My conclusion is that it just gets different.  I feel like the ups and downs of motherhood just get more intense and spread out.  I can go 7 or 8 hours sometimes with minimal stress, and then two crazy hours of wanting to lock my kids in a room while I stand outside and scream.

Day-to-day life is easier because it's no longer a feat of endurance to leave the house;  outings actually have become fun (most of the time.)  As Mila and Siena have gotten older I feel more fulfilled with the interactions I have with them--they're more responsive and have the ability to communicate a bit more than crying and smiling.  And at Tiago's age, it's fulfilling to have full conversations and understand better what happens inside a toddler's head.  

But when a toddler has a screaming tantrum for 30 minutes, I have way less patience than when a newborn cries.  They get more frustrated, and I get more frustrated, and it usually spirals downhill until bedtime.  (Thank goodness for bedtime!)  There's also the factor of skipping naps, which adds another level of stress into a day.  

Yesterday was a good example of how parenting has changed.  Most of the day went well: we went to Target in the morning, played at home, went to the gym.  Then the kids lost it on the way home. They all wanted snacks, but not the ones I had.  Siena wanted my medicine and was furious I wouldn't give it to her.  She wanted my water, which was all gone.  She wanted her shoes on, then off, then on, etc.  And after a 15 minute drive home of nothing but wailing, I tried to get food in them as quickly as possible so they could go to bed.  But they didn't want to eat anything, just hot chocolate.  (Not an option.)  Then they wanted to watch TV.  (Also not an option.)  It took 30 minutes to eat a few bites!  I would've thrown in the towel on dinner, but they had already refused most of their lunch.  

Finally, the girls went to bed, and I was lying with Tiago on his bed trying to get him to close his eyes.  Tiago asked if I was laying laying on top of the blankets because my clothes were dirty.  I told him, "Yes, now close your eyes and sleep."  A few seconds later he started putting his favorite blanket over my shoulders until it was spread out across my body.  "There Mom, now you're warm too."  It was so sweet.

The other day Tiago told me he wanted to write my name (I didn't know he could write.)  I told him the letters, and this is what he produced, followed by a jumbled version of "Tiago."  Seeing his progress is heart warming.

So there you have it, the ups and downs of mothering toddlers.  I'm curious as my kids get older if the stress and joy will become even more intense and spaced out.  

Mila and Siena turn 2!

Mila and Siena have been celebrating turning 2 for over a week, but yesterday was the big day.  It feels like a milestone for me.  But I feel like their 3rd birthday will be a better milestone.  To sum things up: they are exhausting!  Individually, they're great.  Even easy and sweet.  But together it's a lot of crying, hair pulling, climbing on me, vying for my attention, etc.  Two toddlers is a rough business.  However... this post is about celebrating them, so I'll focus on them as individuals instead of the collective chaos of little kids.

Just for a fun comparison, here's the post from Tiago's 2nd birthday.

The girls aren't the most amazing talkers in the world, but they're ahead of where Tiago was.  Their best phrase is probably "Mickey Mouse."  They're obsessed.  Siena started yelling that during the sacrament today at church, which was a little embarrassing.  (Lucky them, they were gifted these cute Mickey outfits from Courtney, plus dolls from my mom, who was at Disneyland last week.)  They also say, "Airplane Papa" (because they hear me telling Tiago that Hyrum went to Poland in an airplane.)  Siena pronounces it more like "ho-pay".  They can count to 5 in Spanish, and know the names of most of their extended family.  When Courtney and Peter left the other day, they waved in the driveway for 5 minutes saying, "Bye bye Peter!"  They're quite dramatic with their goodbyes.  I can't think of other words they say a lot.  Generally, they are talking constantly even though we don't understand most of whats said.  But the fact that they can say "Nemo" and "Dory" makes me think we don't have a speech delay on our hands.  That makes me think of another funny word they say.  "Poppins."  It can refer to the movie Mary Poppins, but its also what they call an umbrella. ha

(Mila is in the red skirt, although that's usually the one Siena wears.)

Last weekend we threw them a little party and invited Hyrum's family over.  It was low key but fun for them to play with cousins and get a little attention.  They weren't sure what to do about the candles, and when it came to opening presents Tiago was always willing to step in and do it for them.  What a good big brother... who really wished they were his presents.  

Siena on left with white bow, Mila on right with pink bow.

During the party, Hyrum's dad called Hyrum on Skype.  He was showing the screen to each kid, and Siena managed this face while "giving Papa a kiss."

The most distinctive feature the girls have is their wild hair.  It it several inches past their shoulders, but curls up to about chin-level.  They hate when I touch it, and it becomes completely tangled after a single nap, so I don't get to do cute things with it as often as I'd like.  (They've each had french braids once... it was adorable.)  I usually wash it once a week then brush through it.  They scream the entire time.  

(I *think* that's Mila on the right)

I came across this picture of Siena.  Her face is so expressive these days, often to communicate concern, disgust, or disapproval.  When someone else has what she wants, she lets you know immediately.  She laughs really loudly, and is usually content with herself.  She's fairly independent, likes to do things her way, but is my child most likely to come up and give me a 5-second hug just because.  She yells and screams to get her way.  Toddler tantrums have been going strong for at least 6 months.  Siena is a wild child.  Unfortunately, she's also had really bad eczema for the last 6 months and sometimes scratches until she bleeds.  

Mila is the singer in our family.  She loves singing in the car, at church, or anywhere else she has the opportunity.  At story time last week they played music for the kids to dance to, and she jumped right up front and started singing and dancing.  It's always a little surprising to me, because she has a timid side, but I think she just enjoys it.  "Let it go" is one of her favorites to sing along to (copying sounds, not quite words), as well as "Book of Mormon Stories" and "If you're Happy and you Know it".  She likes to wave her finger and say, "no, no, no!"  Most of the time she's obedient and always wants to hold my hand when we walk somewhere.  She cries a lot of sad tears and wears her emotions on her sleeve.  But one second she's crying and the next she's bouncing around with joy.  Another thing I love about Mila is her willingness (and delight) in playing by herself.  Since I enjoy alone time so much, I enjoy seeing Mila sit in a quiet room, undisturbed by her loud siblings.  When they're not dressed alike Mila is usually the one that has on pink so it's easier to know who is who in pictures.

They both go to bed around 7 and get up 12 hours later.  I doubt they're asleep that whole time, but they usually do well hanging out in their cribs.  They nap in the afternoon for about 2 hours, but some days they don't nap at all and it drives me a little crazy.

They're in a love/hate relationship with each other.  They love to greet each other good morning with enthusiasm (although they both call each other Mila) and then spend the day stealing toys and pulling hair.  It's not uncommon to find the girls sitting on top of each other, and each is just as likely as the other to be sitting on top.  They both love Tiago and like to carry his hot chocolate to him in the morning.

(Siena on the bottom)

They share a room and don't wake each other up, although I think their talking does sometimes prevent the other one from falling asleep at nap time.  The two ways to tell them apart (besides personality and facial expressions) is the dimple in Siena's nose and the freckle on her left leg.  In person I easily distinguish who is who, but sometimes I'm tricked by pictures.. and have to ask Hyrum.

Speaking of Hyrum, his nicknames for them have remained mostly unchanged for the last year.  Mila is "Rulitos" (although they both have curly hair, I guess he likes Mila's better) and Siena is "Marrana" (piggy).  Skyping with Hyrum gets them so excited.  They wave and blow kisses and point at him.  He's able to get them laughing hard by making funny faces.

Happy birthday girls.  We can't imagine our family without you!

Abrazos

Mila and Siena get a lot of attention individually, due to their smiley nature and wildly curly hair. Put them together, and we get a lot of comments, usually one of the following:

Wow, twins?  [yes, twins]

Look at that hair!

You've got your hands full.

I've heard some moms say they resent that last comment, because they feel judged.  But I always smile at people and say, "Yes, I certainly have my hands full."  What feels like most-of-the-time I have my hands full of toddlers who like to whine, pull hair, steal toys, beg to be carried, sit in the middle of the road, etc. My hands are full, along with my patience worn thin, and my mind fried.  I'm at the stage of motherhood where I wouldn't be insulted by any of those comments, but instead I would nod and agree.  

That means I grasp at whatever straws I'm given.  I was in the kitchen one afternoon cleaning or making dinner, when I saw the girls start chasing each other in my direction.  They'd hug briefly, push away, then repeat.  After realizing this hugging activity was going to last more than a half second, I grabbed my camera to capture a spontaneous 'sweet' moment between sisters.  

That's the kind of picture we'll pull out when they graduate high school together, or be maid of honor at the other one's wedding.  Or it will be the picture we shove in their faces when they fight as teenagers... "Remember you love each other!" 

But I had to laugh when my sister asked, "So they like each other now?" because I don't think love is quite what motivated this hug.  

First step: size up the competition

2. Spread arms and approach

3. Smack

4. Half a second of love, before...

5.  Claw, pull, and scratch until the other retreats (ie: screams for mom)

But like I said, I'll take what I can get to remind me that motherhood is sweet and wonderful, even with hands full.  

[Mila has pink undershirt and Siena has green.]