Showing posts with label baby. Show all posts
Showing posts with label baby. Show all posts

Thursday, July 18, 2019

Enzo Matias Suarez

Induction
Several months ago I talked to my doctor about the possibility of being induced a few days early, so I'd be able to have Jenna fly out and watch my kids while I was at the hospital.  I didn't expect to go into labor early, but wanted to make sure it happened while she was in Texas.  Turns out, my doctor was on vacation for the two weeks surrounding my due date, and after having bought plane tickets, the doctor on call didn't want to induce on Monday, which would have been two days early.  So I asked if they could do Friday, and they basically offered me to come in on Wednesday night for a Thursday induction.  So at the end of the day, I had a baby at 39 +1 weeks, and that was two days before Jenna even arrived.  But she was around for the recovery and helping to entertain the older kids.


Child care
But that also meant that I had to arrange for people to watch my kids for 24 hours-- kind of a huge favor to ask of someone.  Several of the people that offered to help with my kids ended up being on vacation that week, plus our regular babysitter was on vacation.  I lost quite a bit of sleep worrying about it; when I woke up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom, I'd take an hour to go back to sleep because I kept running through different possibilities in my head.  Ultimately, I had one friend with boys who watched Tiago, and another friend watch the girls, for most of Thursday.  (Hyrum dropped them off at 7 am!)   And another friend picked them all up and put them in bed at our house, then spent the night.  What life savers!  Having that all arranged was a huge relief.

Then I started worrying about labor starting Wednesday night (they were having me come in that night to ripen the cervix) while Hyrum was home with the kids.  So I had to ask another lady if she'd be willing to come over in the middle of the night should something happen.  Giving birth can be so unpredictable (and that's even with an induction!) and I felt like I was making plans A, B, and C.




Hospital
On top of all the logistics, my doctor told me I needed to call the hospital Wednesday afternoon to verify there were beds available for an induction.  So then I was paranoid they would tell me to come in a different day and all my plans would be in vain.  I can't describe the relief when they told me to come in.  I hurried and packed a hospital bag, went to buy lunch, and had Hyrum drop me off.

Around 6:30 pm they finally started the cervidil.  I was only dilated to a 1.  I had to stay on the hospital bed with the fetal monitors hooked up for the next 12 hours.  And those beds are so uncomfortable!  My tail bone was killing me.  Plus there was only 1 flat hospital pillow for a huge pregnant lady (I was accustomed to sleeping with about 5!) so I didn't get much sleep.  Nurses came in fairly regularly to adjust the monitors and check my vitals.  I had a blood pressure cuff that took my pressure every 15 minutes.  I'd be surprised if I even had 2 hours of combined sleep.


Birth Day
The next morning around 7 am they removed the cervidil and checked my cervix.  And... I was still at a 1.  Basically no progress.  The day nurse checked a second time, because the doctor wanted her to compare it to the day before.  Then they brought the on-call doctor in to check and see about breaking my water.  She said she'd give me a 2, and that I was about 70% effaced.  I was happy to at least be given that extra cm.  She broke my water, and then they started me on pitocin.  That was a relief, because I was afraid they'd do another 12 hours of cervidil and that the baby would never come.  I guess it was worth three intense cervix checks to get labor started.

Contractions obviously picked up quickly, and were painful enough I couldn't talk through them.  That took some explaining to Hyrum, that I didn't want to chit chat while I was in pain.  The nurse said to ask for an epidural when things got uncomfortable, so by 10 I figured there was no point in waiting.

Three people came in for the epidural, and I think they had the least experienced insert the needle.  My experience in Germany was that the epidural only took 5-10 minutes.  These people were in there for at least 20.  They kept asking me to round my back even more, which I told them I couldn't do because my stomach was in the way.  Meanwhile I was having intense contractions and that blood pressure cuff was now going off every 2-3 minutes.  It was just a sensory overload for my body.  Plus, it was quite painful getting the epidural, with a few times adjusting because it was sending shooting pain down my leg.  After all that fun, the epidural didn't work.  The contractions weren't feeling less painful, so they called the anesthesiology team back in.  They determined, as they kind of suspected, that the epidural hadn't been placed in the correct spot because it was more shallow than expected.  Luckily the second person to do the epidural was better, and placed it in about 5 minutes.  It hurt significantly less, and then it actually worked.  Perhaps too well?  My arms started tingling and feeling cold, so they did some tests (like pinching all over my body and poking me with the corner of an envelope) to determine if the epidural was too high.  They had to turn it off for 20 minutes to see if things improved.  My arms got a little better, so they turned it back on.  Then it mostly did a good job of helping me not feel contractions.  My legs gradually got more and more numb.  By the afternoon I couldn't even wiggle the toes on my left foot, and had no feeling in it as the nurses hoisted it around.

Because my water was broken they tried to avoid doing too many cervix checks to avoid infection, but at 12:30 I was still only 3 cm.  That was discouraging!

I also had nurses that kept getting changed out.  I think over the course of the day I had 6 nurses.  The one in the afternoon was particularly helpful.  She suggested switching positions often to get my hips opened, so her and Hyrum tried to flip me over about every 20-30 minutes-- between my left side, right side, and sitting up.  (Also, using a peanut ball, which was new to me.)

Things had become really unglamorous at that point.  Nurses were changing my catheter, changing pads and towels under me (amniotic fluid was flowing for several hours- gross), and physically lifting and moving my limbs.  I had some really sharp pain a few times, which they said was just pinched nerves while I was on my side, so they had to flip me again.

At 3 pm, I was still only dilated 4 cm!  The day was really dragging.  I fell asleep for maybe 45 minutes, watched some shows on my phone.  Hyrum worked on his laptop and danced around the room listening to Pandora through headphones.  Starting around 5 I was getting really sick and tired of the whole thing.  I was extremely tired, and extremely hungry.  (The nice doctor did at least tell them they could bring me popsicles, juice, and jello.)  All I wanted to do was complain.  I was getting a new nurse at 6, so I was just waiting for the new one to come in before requesting they check my cervix again.  That happened at 6:15, and if I had any feeling in my legs I might have jumped up when she told me I was at a 10.  FINALLY.  I wonder how long I'd been fully dilated, since nobody had checked in several hours.  She called for the doctor, had me to a few practice pushes while we waited, and the doctor (Dr. Sesay) came in around 6:45.

She asked Hyrum how involved he wanted to be.  He said as much as he could be; so they put him in a gown with gloves and got into position.  I started pushing at 6:50 and after 3 or 4 contractions they told me to stop pushing while they adjusted the baby's body.  Hyrum helped pull the baby out on the next push at 6:58 pm.  The doctor had him hold the baby upright for a second, then they handed him to me.  (I couldn't feel the head being born, but felt definite pressure change internally as the body came out.  But absolutely no pain, which was miraculous after my last 2 birth experiences!)

When I saw first saw him, everyone started talking about the umbilical cord, saying it was twisted, wrapped around him, looped, that he must have been spinning around inside.  (There were about 4 people there.)  They hurried and unwrapped the cord, clamped it, and had Hyrum cut it within about 3-4 seconds.  And then they laid him on my chest.  He had dark hair and pink/purple skin.  He whimpered a little but didn't cry much.  His eyes looked extremely squinty as he adjusted to being in the real world.  Meanwhile, I 'delivered' the placenta (I wouldn't have known had the doctor not announced it) and got stitched up from a second-degree tear.






We got to enjoy him for a while before they wiped him off and weighed him: 8 lb 2 oz.  His apgar score was a 9.  He was able to breastfeed right away without issue.  We stayed in the delivery room for over 3 hours while I regained feeling in my legs.  Things were still pretty shaky for the next 12 hours, but I could at least shuffle to the bathroom.  Apparently right after our baby was born, several other deliveries happened, and by the next day the recovery rooms were completely full.  I was glad to get in when I did!


Name
Back when we were naming Tiago, we had a few names on our list we hadn't used.  Enzo was one of them.  I've always just liked it, and it's easy to say.  We added Matias to our short list this time around, and thought it sounded good as a middle name.  One Italian name and one Spanish name. Glad to have that decision behind me!

Recovery
Thank goodness the hospital beds in the recovery wing are significantly more comfortable.  Despite needing to wake up every 3 hours to feed the baby I was in such a deep sleep the rest of the night I felt like a new woman on Friday morning.  I only had snacks after giving birth (the cafeteria was closed, and Hyrum was busy helping me until 10:30 so it didn't make sense for him to leave and get food);  Friday morning I placed an order for a big breakfast as soon as they opened and really enjoyed having people bring me meals for the next two days.  It was difficult for me to get in and our of bed without pain, but it felt good to stand/walk around after spending 24 hours laying on the other hospital bed.  The nurses kept checking my uterus position by pushing down hard, and that hurt like crazy.  And when the baby nursed, my cramping got pretty bad.  But the pain meds helped.  Hyrum was able to stay with my Thursday night and help with all the diaper changes/feedings, but he went home Friday morning to watch the kids.  Friday night I was on my own, but luckily feeling well enough that it wasn't a problem.  One funny memory from Thursday night was Hyrum changing the baby's diaper, and struggling to get the diaper on.  Then the baby started pooping everywhere.  That frazzled Hyrum, and then the baby started to have fluid come up his throat and was starting to struggle.  Luckily the nurse walked in at just that moment and started to suction the fluid from his mouth, and Hyrum kept going with the diaper.  But in the end the nurse was like, "How about I take the baby to bathe him, and we'll throw all these blankets away?"  Everything was such a mess at 4 am!  Something similar happened to me Friday, but besides straining my back a little, it ended ok.

Meeting siblings
The kids came to meet their brother later on Friday morning.  They were SO EXCITED.  They watched me finish feeding him and kept declaring how cute he was.  They rubbed his head and each got turns holding him.  Mila told me, "I'm not going to cry or be sad the whole time he's a baby."  They all kept saying, "Mom, your baby is so cuuuuute."  Tiago in particular was just smitten.  We kept looking over and seeing him just watching and smiling at the baby.  They stayed for nearly 4 hours, although part of that included a trip to the cafeteria.  They went home for a few hours, then came back at dinner time to say goodnight to the baby.  We got to order food to the room, which they thought was fun, especially since it involved two desserts.

Explaining childbirth to little kids was a funny experience.  They mostly understood that the vagina stretches out for the baby to get out, but then it hurts.  They were asking about my stomach and I explained that the uterus takes a while to shrink back down.  We explained to them what circumcision is.  During one of Siena's prayers, she prayed that my 'private parts would stop hurting' which I thought was hilarious.  Because I was hoping for the same thing!  With all the talk about body changes, the thing that grossed them out the most was Enzo's belly button/umbilical cord.











Going home
Saturday we got to leave the hospital just after noon.  We were hoping to go earlier, but I was waiting for my doctor to make the rounds and discharge me.  The kids waited patiently, and enjoyed watching the television from my bed, which they also found fascinating.  My tailbone was still kind of sore, along with all my private parts, but I could walk without any problem and it sure felt good to move.  Not to mention, I hadn't left my room for two whole days.  As soon as we got home Hyrum left with the kids to pick up Jenna from the airport.


One week later
Now it's been a week since Enzo was born.  He is such an angelic baby!  Truly, he hardly cries.  I attribute that in part to the fact that he's always being fed and held.  To establish milk supply, and since I can, I've been feeding on demand and not worrying about any kind of schedule.  (That's completely opposite of what I did with Mila and Siena, because with twins a schedule is the only way to sanity.)  So all he does is eat, sleep, and get his diaper changed.  He sleeps so much, and is very content when he's awake.  He always has gas or bowel movements when he's at his most relaxed state, usually right after eating or falling asleep.  There have been a few times at night when he cries instead of falling right back asleep but we're all figuring it out.  And even though we generally still wake him up every 3 hours to eat, after the 3/4 am feeding we let him sleep til he wakes up and it's sometimes a glorious 4+ hours.  (Reality will probably hit in a week when he stops being so sleepy.)

His first doctor appointment was Tuesday.  When leaving the hospital he had lost 7% of birth weight, and was down to 7 lb 7 oz; by Tuesday he was back up to 7 lb 14 oz, which was only a loss of 3%.  So in short, he's gaining weight well and looked completely healthy.

The kids' enthusiasm still hasn't worn off.  Whenever they'd go out during the day with Jenna, the first thing they'd do upon returning is put on hand sanitizer and run to the baby to see how he is.  Tiago is always asking where he is so he can check on him.  They put stuffed animals under his arms and rub his head.  Tiago keeps requesting Enzo join him at bedtime to read books.  He just likes having him around.  Many people think the baby looks like Tiago, which makes him a very proud big brother.  Last night Hyrum had a meeting, so Tiago offered to put the girls in bed by himself.  (And he did! Including a prayer, song, and reading books.)  He's been extremely helpful, and the girls have really made an effort to help with the baby, too.



Jenna was here to help for 4 days.  She was fantastic doing all the mundane stuff like emptying the dishwasher and serving my kids lunch.  They went to parks, the pool, Target, the pet store, the movie theater, etc.  So much fun with Aunt Jenna around!  Apparently at the movie she bought them a giant popcorn which was refilled once.  And she bought herself a big coke.  In the middle of the movie Siena asked if she could have a sip because she was "so so so thirsty."  Jenna said yes, and when she looked over a little while later, Siena was leaning over, mouth attached to the straw, and half the soda was gone.  And then there were multiple trips to the bathroom.

My physical recovery from birth is great at this point.  I still had a lot of pain from my stitches for the first 3-4 days, plus cramping.  But now most of that feels normal.  I'm frustrated because two other areas have taken a turn for the worst-- my chest during breastfeeding and my back.  Pain from one increases the pain from the other, in a vicious cycle.  I went to the chiropractor two days ago because I could barely walk (it feels like a pinched nerve in my right hip) and my OB yesterday.  I hope everything starts improving.  And it makes me incredibly grateful to have friends providing some meals so I don't make myself worse.

And the entire time it's taken me to write this, Enzo has been fast asleep and completely adorable!

Friday, July 10, 2015

What's it like having twins?

When I found out I was pregnant with twins, I was in complete shock.  Apparently some women always secretly hope they have twins, but honestly the thought never crossed my mind.

Now that I've survived a twin pregnancy and spent the last 4 months with these girls, I thought I'd write some of my thoughts on life with twins.

[But first, an explanation about these pictures, which I just remembered I'd never posted before!  The first three were taken by a photographer in the hospital.  They're scanned copies of the originals, so the quality looks really bad.  I can't believe how much hair the girls have... and Siena's hair is all over the place -- childbirth is tough on them, too!  And a word on those stuffed animals: sometimes Germans just do weird things.  I think it's culturally acceptable for them to stick a completely random - fairly ugly - stuffed animal into a baby picture; and they think it's adorable.  But whatever... the pictures were free.  Moving on.  The rest of the pictures were taken when the girls were about two weeks old by a friend of mine.  Let's just say a newborn shoot with two babies is a lot of work!  They weren't asleep for hardly any of it, and we were kind of scrambling around just to keep the girls safe and not screaming.  But I love how they turned out.  Also, the bows are a bit random once I remembered to put them on.  Their heads were so tiny hardly any headbands fit properly at that point.  Enough about the pictures.]


^^Siena
^^Mila

The other day a woman stopped me in the grocery store.  To set the scene, Tiago was sitting up front, one carseat was in the back, and a baby was strapped to my chest.  She said, "I just found out I'm having twins, and it's so nice to see that you can really do it!"  I saw a lot of nervousness and relief in her face, and an unasked question kind of hung in the air: will I survive??  I felt for her.  


Part way through my pregnancy I remember writing down a bunch of questions I was wondering about.  And in this case, wondering translates to searching the internet during most of my free time for any information that might help.  With time, we figured it all out.  Here are those questions, now answered.

What stroller can accommodate three kids under the age of two?  Baby Jogger City Select. It's awesome, as far as double strollers go.  Tiago sits obediently on the little kickboard and away we go!  
Where in the world will everyone sleep?  We moved Tiago into our old office, put the desk in storage, and sleep both girls in one crib in Tiago's old nursery.  About half of Tiago's current room is used for storage, but he does have a bed and dresser.
Do we move Tiago to a bed before he's 18 months old?  Kind of.  We had two cribs: one for the girls, one for Tiago.  But in anticipation of needing him out of the crib, we started putting him to sleep on the mattress on the floor, and took his crib apart entirely.  He sleeps half-off the mattress,so I'm not sure how he'll do with a real bed (once we move) but the girls are already starting to kick each other at night so separate cribs for them are on the horizon.
Should we be buying a van, like we'd always planned on doing when we had three kids?  There were no good vans to be had in Germany (something to last us... forever) so we bought a sedan and squished all three car seats in the back.  I cannot wait to get a van!  Even the price tag doesn't affect me much... for the last several months when I look at our bank accounts I'm already mentally adjusting things for the cost of a van.   
Is it even possible to go home for Christmas this year like we'd planned?  Nope.  I couldn't fly that late in my pregnancy (so I missed one sister's wedding) but we were able to go in November instead and make it for another sister's wedding.  You win some, you lose some.
Will I be missing weddings for multiple siblings?  Yes.  I missed TWO weddings.  I still can't really believe it, but it was very much out of my control, and I suppose it was about time for them to get married so there was no point in waiting.
Will we be able to travel with three babies without going insane?  Yes, we didn't go insane, but it was an adjustment to slow way down and plan to do way less.  After one family trip to Venice we decided to split up and take solo trips while the other stayed home with the kids.  I'll call that "creative problem solving." 
How in the world would we come up with TWO baby names when figuring out just one was a huge struggle?  The struggle is/was real.  But eventually we committed to Mila and Siena.  
Breastfeeding two babies...?  .... nope.  I pumped for two months, and then switched to formula.  Best decision ever (for me). But that's a whole other topic for another day.
Will I be able to move or do anything when I'm 7 months pregnant?  Yes! I was happily surprised that I never had to go on bed rest, although I felt pretty huge and useless by 7 or 8 months.  (Let's be honest, I felt that way by 5 months.)


What I told the lady in the store was that it's not nearly as bad as I was expecting.  It's hard.  And it's expensive.  But it's possible.  I also told her that she should invest in a really good double stroller.

I actually have really enjoyed these two during the newborn stage, particularly early on when they slept for looooong stretches during the day and night.  :)  I think I braced myself for the worst, and heard a lot of people tell me that 'once they're older, it will work out great because they will entertain each other.'

As much as I fought against the idea at first, and sort of wished there was one instead of two, it's impossible now to think of having one here without the other.  Both Mila and Siena make our family complete.


That being said, it's a lot of work.  Of course there's twice as much feeding, bottle washing and diaper changing. But that's the easy part.  Some days I don't even get five minutes without at least one of my kids being awake and wanting attention. The older they get, the needier they get.  And Tiago decides on a daily basis whether he likes them, or whether he wants to throw toys at them.  Once they're crying, I have to console them, which takes the attention off the first born and he starts crying, too. 

[That picture up there was a piece of work!  We basically had to force him next to the basket and then take pictures of him running away.  He wanted nothing to do with them.  Someone told me he looks like a protective older brother... ha!]


I've spent a lot of time thinking about the baby stage, and I have asked myself whether I would have enjoyed each girl more if they came separately and not together.  And I think my answer is yes, which might be the toughest part of having twins so far.  With Tiago I had a lot of sweet moments of just me and him sitting in the big recliner making faces at each other, or watching him sleep in my arms after the last feeding of the night.  There were certain songs I sang to him, and a lot of playing after he got out of the bathtub before he got dressed.

It's hard to get that unique one-on-one time with two babies at the same time.  So much of what I do with them is simultaneous.  If I sit on the floor entertaining them and making them smile, it's an experience shared between the three of us.  They get fed together, do tummy time together, and take walks together.  When it's bath time (a rare occurrence at our house) I hurry and finish with one so I can bathe the other before they're both screaming.  A lot of the attention I give them is reactionary.  Whichever one is fussiest gets held.  And during the moments when they're both clean, dressed/diapered, and content/asleep, I have Tiago's messes to pick up, bottles to wash and laundry to fold.

A lot of these issues probably arise with any baby that's not the first, but when it comes to prioritizing the needs of children, it's easy to say the newborn gets the attention when needed and the others can wait.  (I do it with Tiago all the time.)  Two newborns though changes the equation.


I'm not sure if this will become irrelevant when they're older.  Maybe less baby demands will give me more time to devote to one-on-one attention.  Or maybe the pros of being a twin will just start to dwarf this con.  In the long run I know they will love having each other as companions and best friends.

For now, though, they just unknowingly kick each other in the face and compete for my attention.  And I keep trying to juggle them all the best I can.  Occasionally they get a little squished (see picture below for evidence) but they forget stuff, so I think they'll all turn out okay!

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Traveling with [little] kids

I read an article once about going to Disneyland 'on the cheap'.  It started by saying you can't actually do Disneyland 'on the cheap'; Disneyland will always be expensive.  With some helpful tips, you can only make it slightly less expensive.  

When we were traveling this past weekend in Venice with three little ones, that line kept popping into my head: it will always be expensive.  Because despite all my efforts to plan an easy vacation, it only makes traveling with kids slightly less hard.

There was some of this:

And this:
 And a lot of this:


Here are a few discoveries I made about traveling with three little kids:

1) Lower expectations!  Don't plan too much.  Everything will take way longer than anticipated.  And there will be plenty of crying.  It's a very different experience from traveling alone.  We just had to be okay with that and not let it bother us.  Before we had kids, we'd usually go back to the hotel after dinner and just crash and relax for a few hours.  On this trip, the second we got into the hotel room, a marathon of work began: unpack from the day, lay out wet stuff to dry, change their diapers, get bottles ready, then wash the day's bottles, get ourselves ready for bed, bathe Tiago, get everyone in pajamas, put Tiago in bed, feed babies and get them to sleep, bedtime for us because we didn't want to risk disturbing the kids.  Whew!  At least when you go to bed at 8:30 its a lot easier to get up with kids at 5:00 am.
Tiago went from dry and happy to completely soaked.


2) Good gear is worth the money! Upfront, kids cost a lot.  I remember dropping a few hundred on our first stroller, then researching expensive strollers a second time when we found out we needed one for three kids.  But, it's the best money I've spent.  With most baby products, I think you get what you pay for.  I have a bad back, but didn't have any problems carrying a baby in my Ergo carrier for 2 days straight.  Most of the stroller advice I read for Venice was to take a small, light umbrella stroller to get up and down the bridges easier.  After one day of juggling a rain umbrella while pushing an umbrella stroller that requires two hands, we decided to get out our Britax single stroller.  So. much. easier!  It's light, can be steared with one hand, and turns easily baby carrier, So Rick Steves was wrong about the umbrella stroller business.  (Although a double stroller would've been a nightmare!)  Other awesome baby products I'm glad we had with us include formula dispensers and an ipad holder so Tiago could watch stuff during the 8-turned-10-hour drive.





3) Use their cuteness to your advantage. We had so so so many people stop us and want to look at the kids, particularly when Siena and Mila were out of their baby carriers (like feeding time, at restaurants, and on the boats).  They'd ask us if they were twins, then if they were girls, how old, and then comment on how cute Tiago was as their big brother.  Hyrum got to practice some italian, gemelli in particular.  It was nice to see other people enjoy them, because it made me feel less crazy for having three little kids.  (Except when we attracted big crowds, then I just felt like a circus.) At one restaurant, Hyrum was inside changing Tiago and I was holding both babies, with Siena screaming her head off.  A British lady two tables away came and took one from me, then held and entertained Mila for 15 minutes.  It was awesome!  People helped lifting the stroller up and down bridges, and we always got seats on the public transportation.

Here we are in our special seats at the front of the boat.  We attracted quite a bit of attention while feeding the babies.  Some people sitting a few rows in front of us started taking pictures of us, so I said, "Well, you can at least take one for us with our camera to document this madness."  This definitely portrays the non-glamorous side of traveling with kids.


4) And who cares what everyone else things, anyway.  At one point it was pouring down rain outside, and none of the kids had been changed in hours.  So as soon as we got on a public transportation boat for a 20 minute ride, we just changed them right there with everyone watching.  There wasn't the luxury of a private bathroom, and while most people without kids probably thought we were gross, you gotta do what you gotta do.  We'll never see them again anyway.

[I can't be the only one that thinks that surface to the right looks like a built-in changing table? ha]

4) Gelato makes everything better. We basically bought some wherever we saw it.  It cheered us up, and Tiago also loved it.  Many times we said to ourselves, If only we could give some to Mila and Siena to make them stop crying, too!

5) There's no place like home.  Coming home and unpacking, then sleeping in my own bed... that might be my favorite part about traveling.  After all five of us being crammed in a hotel room for three days, our apartment felt huge.  I also didn't mind washing bottles so much anymore because I didn't have to do it on a counter-less bathroom sink.

The drive home... pictures are so much more quiet than real life!


With all that being said, I'm glad went to Venice.  Having kids along makes for moments like these:





But I'm also glad we're leaving Europe soon so I don't feel too tempted to do it again.