Grown-up Tiago

Tiago is 22 months old! Wow.

We look at him and see a big kid.  His baby days are behind him.  Waaaaaay behind him.  It doesn't help that we buzzed his hair pretty short.  It aged him about a year, but he's looking pretty cute.

He does a lot of fun things at this age (at least in my mom opinion.)  I want to remember the fun things, because he has also started throwing a lot of tantrums.  He doesn't communicate very much, and gets frustrated, so he throws his whole body around and refuses to be held.  That usually results in banging his head against furniture or a wall, making him cry even harder.  (In a mean way, I actually prefer when that happens because his emotions move from mad to sad, and I can help a sad Tiago much better than a mad one.)

Basically since day 1, Hyrum has been pushing Tiago towards soccer.  Before Tiago could walk, Hyrum carried him around kicking the ball; and now that he walks, he does a great job dribbling. We have so many soccer balls around the house that he seems to be kicking them all the time, which makes his papa proud.

Those two play together a lot---the kind of energetic, running around hiding and screaming play that I find rather exhausting.  Sometimes when Tiago gets particularly worked up or scared, he'll start pointing to random things trying to distract Hyrum so he can't 'get' Tiago.

Although he doesn't say much, his vocabulary is slowly growing.  He said Mama, Papa, uh-oh (which Hyrum said doesn't count because it's not a word, but he says it all. the. time.), wawa (for agua), buh-bye, and his latest word (obsession) is "bús" (rhymes with goose).  He got a little double decker bus when we were in London, and he loves to play with it and say "booosh!"  When Hyrum gets home from work, Tiago usually grabs the bus and runs to the door to give it to Hyrum.  [He just started saying "mas" --"more" in Spanish.  Ironically, it's because we made brownies, so he kept running to the counter and saying "mas?"]

Just a quick note about his use of "buh bye", because it's something funny I want to remember.  He doesn't usually say it when people are leaving.  He said it when he wants us to leave him alone, and when he wants us to know he's leaving to go somewhere else.  For example, this morning I found him getting into some stuff he shouldn't have been playing with.  I told him to play with something else and he kept insisting "buh bye!" and waving me away as furiously as he could.  Along the same lines, if I try to get him out of the bath tub before he's ready, he waves me away emphatically.

He gets jealous of the attention we give his sisters.  But when they both have to be changed and fed, there's not much a mother can do, so he'll just have to learn some patience.  I tried to start baking with him.  We made cookies a few times, and I helped him measure the ingredients into a bowl.  Now he'll walk into the kitchen and point to the measuring cups and flour and start whining.  If only my body could handle making chocolate chip cookies every day, I'd be on board.  But my weight is kind of going in the wrong direction even without all the extra baking.

Two traits that Tiago continues to show (that I love) are being helpful, and being relatively calm.  He loves to bring us things, like toys, that he thinks we want. He will turn on the TV if we ask him to. When I unload the dishwasher, he loves to take things out and give them to me.  (I need to work on giving him things to do that will actually be productive...)  And he's not a wild-child in public, which I really appreciate.  I can take him to my doctor appointments and he'll sit still; when I'm loading the girls out of the stroller and into the car, he'll just sit on the stroller and wait for his turn to get in the car; and at the store he'll walk alongside the stroller, or explore a bit, but never wander too far away that I can't easily find him.  I'm afraid if he was crazier I would never leave the house.

Here are a few pictures of him from the last several months:

A helicopter landed in the lot next to our house, so Tiago sat in that window for quite a long time watching.

He pulled the jelly off the table, then proceded to explore the best method for getting large quantities out for consumption.

 Almost every night he lays back in the tub and asks for us to hand him a book to read. 

 He probably watches his fair share of TV.

I thought I'd get a better reaction out of him the first time he tried Sour Patch Kids.

 Somehow as we were organizing the house for movers to come, this happened.

Bitter Sweet (mostly sweet) move

Our movers are here today.  Our stuff is getting shipped back to the states in two shipments: one slow (boat) and one fast (plane).  We've been keeping ourselves quite busy the last few days separating everything and securing the fast shipment in an area where it wouldn't accidentally get packed yet.  (It will be picked up in a few weeks.)  We have mixed feelings about leaving, but I think we mostly feel ready.

A few things we will miss:

--Living in a beautiful area and hardly ever running into traffic; to get to church we drive 25 minutes through beautiful countryside and only have one traffic light.  Even though it can be a hassle to live so far from stores, it's also a nice break to not be surrounded by commercialism.
--US holiday schedule; When Hyrum has days off because of a US holiday, Germans are still working.  We don't have to fight crowds at restaurants or sight-seeing.
--COLA; we get extra money in our paycheck while we live here because the cost of living is higher.  I'll be sad to see that go!
-Gelato.  No need to say more.

But here are the reasons I'm excited to get back to the states:

--I'm SO ready to buy a van!
--I'm SO ready to live in a bigger apartment (or house, hopefully soon!)  We need some outdoor space for the kids to play.  And I'm sick of living on the second floor and carrying the kids and the groceries up and down.
--The trash situation here is frustrating; we have a tiny trash can that gets picked up every 2 weeks.  It can't even handle the diapers, let alone everything else.  Plus, as much as I love the earth, I'm sick of this forced recycling.  I hate cleaning all my plastic food containers just to throw them away.
--Our apartment doesn't have a garbage disposal.  I'd really like one.
--I haven't been able to use a lot of my appliances in Germany because our kitchen storage space is small and any 100v appliances require a transformer.  I've missed my KitchenAid!
--It will be convenient to live in a similar time zone as our families-- not 8 hours ahead.
--Every time I pump gas here I have to drag all three kids inside to pay.  I'm really looking forward to pay-at-the-pump gas.
--I can't wait for Amazon 2-day shipping, right to my door.  Here, I have to pick up all packages and letters at the on-post post office.  And like the gas station, I have to get all my kids out of the car and bring them inside two separate buildings.
--Flights home to see family won't cost over $800 per person.


I just wish that another few days of movers, selling a car, shipping a car, 12 nights in a hotel and 24+ hours of international travel didn't stand between us and the USA!

What's it like having twins?

When I found out I was pregnant with twins, I was in complete shock.  Apparently some women always secretly hope they have twins, but honestly the thought never crossed my mind.

Now that I've survived a twin pregnancy and spent the last 4 months with these girls, I thought I'd write some of my thoughts on life with twins.

[But first, an explanation about these pictures, which I just remembered I'd never posted before!  The first three were taken by a photographer in the hospital.  They're scanned copies of the originals, so the quality looks really bad.  I can't believe how much hair the girls have... and Siena's hair is all over the place -- childbirth is tough on them, too!  And a word on those stuffed animals: sometimes Germans just do weird things.  I think it's culturally acceptable for them to stick a completely random - fairly ugly - stuffed animal into a baby picture; and they think it's adorable.  But whatever... the pictures were free.  Moving on.  The rest of the pictures were taken when the girls were about two weeks old by a friend of mine.  Let's just say a newborn shoot with two babies is a lot of work!  They weren't asleep for hardly any of it, and we were kind of scrambling around just to keep the girls safe and not screaming.  But I love how they turned out.  Also, the bows are a bit random once I remembered to put them on.  Their heads were so tiny hardly any headbands fit properly at that point.  Enough about the pictures.]

^^Siena

^^Mila

The other day a woman stopped me in the grocery store.  To set the scene, Tiago was sitting up front, one carseat was in the back, and a baby was strapped to my chest.  She said, "I just found out I'm having twins, and it's so nice to see that you can really do it!"  I saw a lot of nervousness and relief in her face, and an unasked question kind of hung in the air: will I survive??  I felt for her.  

Part way through my pregnancy I remember writing down a bunch of questions I was wondering about.  And in this case, wondering translates to searching the internet during most of my free time for any information that might help.  With time, we figured it all out.  Here are those questions, now answered.

What stroller can accommodate three kids under the age of two?  Baby Jogger City Select. It's awesome, as far as double strollers go.  Tiago sits obediently on the little kickboard and away we go!  
Where in the world will everyone sleep?  We moved Tiago into our old office, put the desk in storage, and sleep both girls in one crib in Tiago's old nursery.  About half of Tiago's current room is used for storage, but he does have a bed and dresser.
Do we move Tiago to a bed before he's 18 months old?  Kind of.  We had two cribs: one for the girls, one for Tiago.  But in anticipation of needing him out of the crib, we started putting him to sleep on the mattress on the floor, and took his crib apart entirely.  He sleeps half-off the mattress,so I'm not sure how he'll do with a real bed (once we move) but the girls are already starting to kick each other at night so separate cribs for them are on the horizon.
Should we be buying a van, like we'd always planned on doing when we had three kids?  There were no good vans to be had in Germany (something to last us... forever) so we bought a sedan and squished all three car seats in the back.  I cannot wait to get a van!  Even the price tag doesn't affect me much... for the last several months when I look at our bank accounts I'm already mentally adjusting things for the cost of a van.   
Is it even possible to go home for Christmas this year like we'd planned?  Nope.  I couldn't fly that late in my pregnancy (so I missed one sister's wedding) but we were able to go in November instead and make it for another sister's wedding.  You win some, you lose some.
Will I be missing weddings for multiple siblings?  Yes.  I missed TWO weddings.  I still can't really believe it, but it was very much out of my control, and I suppose it was about time for them to get married so there was no point in waiting.
Will we be able to travel with three babies without going insane?  Yes, we didn't go insane, but it was an adjustment to slow way down and plan to do way less.  After one family trip to Venice we decided to split up and take solo trips while the other stayed home with the kids.  I'll call that "creative problem solving." 
How in the world would we come up with TWO baby names when figuring out just one was a huge struggle?  The struggle is/was real.  But eventually we committed to Mila and Siena.  
Breastfeeding two babies...?  .... nope.  I pumped for two months, and then switched to formula.  Best decision ever (for me). But that's a whole other topic for another day.
Will I be able to move or do anything when I'm 7 months pregnant?  Yes! I was happily surprised that I never had to go on bed rest, although I felt pretty huge and useless by 7 or 8 months.  (Let's be honest, I felt that way by 5 months.)

What I told the lady in the store was that it's not nearly as bad as I was expecting.  It's hard.  And it's expensive.  But it's possible.  I also told her that she should invest in a really good double stroller.

I actually have really enjoyed these two during the newborn stage, particularly early on when they slept for looooong stretches during the day and night.  :)  I think I braced myself for the worst, and heard a lot of people tell me that 'once they're older, it will work out great because they will entertain each other.'

As much as I fought against the idea at first, and sort of wished there was one instead of two, it's impossible now to think of having one here without the other.  Both Mila and Siena make our family complete.

That being said, it's a lot of work.  Of course there's twice as much feeding, bottle washing and diaper changing. But that's the easy part.  Some days I don't even get five minutes without at least one of my kids being awake and wanting attention. The older they get, the needier they get.  And Tiago decides on a daily basis whether he likes them, or whether he wants to throw toys at them.  Once they're crying, I have to console them, which takes the attention off the first born and he starts crying, too. 

[That picture up there was a piece of work!  We basically had to force him next to the basket and then take pictures of him running away.  He wanted nothing to do with them.  Someone told me he looks like a protective older brother... ha!]

I've spent a lot of time thinking about the baby stage, and I have asked myself whether I would have enjoyed each girl more if they came separately and not together.  And I think my answer is yes, which might be the toughest part of having twins so far.  With Tiago I had a lot of sweet moments of just me and him sitting in the big recliner making faces at each other, or watching him sleep in my arms after the last feeding of the night.  There were certain songs I sang to him, and a lot of playing after he got out of the bathtub before he got dressed.

It's hard to get that unique one-on-one time with two babies at the same time.  So much of what I do with them is simultaneous.  If I sit on the floor entertaining them and making them smile, it's an experience shared between the three of us.  They get fed together, do tummy time together, and take walks together.  When it's bath time (a rare occurrence at our house) I hurry and finish with one so I can bathe the other before they're both screaming.  A lot of the attention I give them is reactionary.  Whichever one is fussiest gets held.  And during the moments when they're both clean, dressed/diapered, and content/asleep, I have Tiago's messes to pick up, bottles to wash and laundry to fold.

A lot of these issues probably arise with any baby that's not the first, but when it comes to prioritizing the needs of children, it's easy to say the newborn gets the attention when needed and the others can wait.  (I do it with Tiago all the time.)  Two newborns though changes the equation.

I'm not sure if this will become irrelevant when they're older.  Maybe less baby demands will give me more time to devote to one-on-one attention.  Or maybe the pros of being a twin will just start to dwarf this con.  In the long run I know they will love having each other as companions and best friends.

For now, though, they just unknowingly kick each other in the face and compete for my attention.  And I keep trying to juggle them all the best I can.  Occasionally they get a little squished (see picture below for evidence) but they forget stuff, so I think they'll all turn out okay!

Mila & Siena: 4 months!

We've survived four months, and unfortunately, things aren't getting easier.  (Although I still wouldn't say it's too crazy.)  Mila and Siena don't have any consistency with their naps, except in the fact that if one falls asleep, the other will probably stay awake.  I'm trying not to care too much, and wait till they're a little older to fall into a routine, but they're also starting to sleep less at night.  They used to sleep till 7:30 or 8, and now sometimes they wake up at 6 or 6:30.  My previous mantra of "If I get enough sleep at night, I'm okay with whatever happens during the day" is starting to crumble.

But the good news is they're growing, and after temporarily falling off the baby weight chart, Mila is back on at the 5th percentile.  She weighs just over 11 lbs and Siena weighs just over 12 lbs (10th percentile).  Ironically in these 4-month pictures, Siena is in a 0-3 month jumper, and Mila is in a 3-6 month shirt and newborn shorts.  But with the summer heat, most days they just sport a diaper anyway.

Both girls are quite mobile in their cribs.  They wake up with someone's feet in the other's head (Mila is usually the victim) or with a hand on the other's face.  Mila is now pretty good at rolling from back to front, and seems to prefer sleeping on her stomach.  If tummy time were a sport, Siena would be winning, but she hasn't succeeded in rolling yet.

Along with tummy time, we've been trying to help Mila stretch out her neck muscles since the doctor told us at her 2-month appointment that she has torticollis (and a really flat head on her left).  It's improved a little, but she still has a ways to go.

Both girls love to smile, and their starting to laugh when you tickle their necks.  They both have a husky laugh that sounds like a mix of crying and laughing.  When they laugh Tiago thinks it's funny and joins in.

That counterbalances the group crying they like to all take part in. If one twin starts wailing, it's only a matter of time before the other joins her (sympathy crying) and then Tiago gets mad about it and wants attention (that he can't get) so he starts crying, too.  Sometimes we have a lot of fun around here!!

 When I was taking pictures Mila started this new trick of sticking out her tongue.

And here's Tiago checking out Mila's belly button.  Not sure what his fascination is, but he loves finding it and then pressing down (unfortunately pretty hard.)

As they both gain weight, I'm having a harder time telling them apart.  It's never hard when they're side by side, but when they're apart I second guess myself.  Or if I pick someone up, I occasionally just don't bother to figure out who is who.  The other night after putting the girls in bed, I asked Hyrum which one he'd fed and put in the crib.  He thought about it, and I thought about it, and we couldn't remember.  "Well, whichever one it was..."  Some day we'll have to stop doing that and pay more attention to their individual identities.  Luckily with them being so little they're quite similar, and we can interchange them without hurting their feelings.  [I still don't think they're identical, just very similar genetics.]

And just for fun, here they are at 1,2, 3, and 4 months!

Portugal, part 2

Continuing on...

Once I made it down the hill from Pena Palace, I caught a bus (fortunately!) to the Moorish Castle ruins.  It was 95 degrees outside, and full sun.

The castle is over 1000 years old, and was taken over from the Moors by the Christians in 1147.  A lot of what stands today has been restored, but that doesn't bother me... it was still fun to see!  

One of the first things I noticed was all the stairs...fortunately, the views at the top made the sweat and fatigue worth it.  [Later in the day, while waiting for the train back to Lisbon, I was talking to an Asian guy who had also visited the castle.  He was dressed in sneakers and exercise clothes, and told me I was definitely not dressed appropriately for the day's activities!]  

Almost the same picture as above, but I was a little higher so I could also see Pena Palace in the distance.

The National Palace, the oldest surviving royal palace in Portugal.

I ate several ice creams while waiting for the train, then did some more exploring back in Lisbon for the afternoon.  It was still melt-like-a-popcicle weather so I was super grateful the city has these trolley lifts to get up steep hills.  At first it seemed like the lazy option, but the hill was long, so by the time I reached the top I was thinking the Portuguese were quite smart.  The trolley dropped us off at a great look-out of the city.

The rest of my walk was downhill, enjoying the neighborhood called Bairro Alto.  The first stop was Sao Roque, a Jesuit church from the 16th century.  Two interesting things about this church are 1) one of the side 'chapels' was actually from Rome.  It was disassembled and shipped here; the columns and altar are made of lapis lazuli.  2) the ceiling is completely flat, but painted as if it were an elaborate design.  Kind of funny looking, especially with the flash bouncing off the wood boards.

Because things are on such a steep hill, you can usually see quite a bit of the city from anywhere.  In this one particular area, there was an elevator to bring people down to 'street level' (just one block over.)  The alternative was walking down a bunch of steps.  

Near the elevator is Convento de Carmo.  A little history--Lisbon had a huge earthquake in 1755 that destroyed a good part of the city.  They decided to leave the Gothic arches of this church standing as a reminder of that event, so it's just a shell of a church.  I also saw the National Guard building, with a soldier outside.

At the bottom of the hill, I found a little cafe to buy pastel de nata, a famous little pastry in Portugal with custard in the middle.  I was not disappointed. Then I stood around for a while on Praca de Figueira (a town square) waiting for a trolley that was supposed to pass by every 20 minutes and do a loop around the old neighborhood.  But I waited and waited and waited...  I saw a few trolleys pass by, but not the one I wanted, so eventually I went back to my hotel and laid on the bed in the air conditioned room and watched TV in silence.  It was awesome.

The next morning I headed back into Lisbon for a walk around the neighborhood, Baixa.  First, I took a minute to check out the book sale they have set up in the metro station.  I thought this was a great way to promote reading, and I bought a little board book for Tiago in Portuguese.  

 I started in Praca do Rossio (another town square.)  Here's the National Theater, with the historic train station to the left.  I passed it by the first time I was looking for it, because I thought it just seemed like a pretty building.

A lot of the buildings I saw supported my "run-down but charming" take on Lisbon.  This building, for example, had broken glass on the majority of windows.  But all over the city I saw beautiful tiled walls, bright colors, and interesting shaped doors and windows.

 

After the earthquake, a lot of the town was reconstructed, military style.  There were straight roads and organized city blocks, and only certain buildings were permitted to be reconstructed.  Several churches didn't make the cut, but the church of St. Nicola was rebuilt, albeit with the side of the church blending into the rest of the street's buildings.

 This large arch is reminiscent of Paris' Arch de Triumph, with explorer Vasco de Gama on top.  The square it opens up to is Praca do Comercio.  There wasn't much there, except pretty yellow buildings.  Also, you can see below the black and white designs on the cobblestone street--very typical around Lisbon.

On my walk to a different train station, I passed along the Rio Tejo, which seems like it should be the ocean, but it's not.  Just a large opening of a river that flows from the Atlantic, through Portugal and into Spain.  Looks kind of like San Francisco...

The train took me along the 'coast' to Cascais, a little fishing town with a beach!  For me, any summer vacation is completed by a nice beach.  Although I would have loved to spend the whole day soaking up the sun, it was unfortunately kind of cloudy.  It was warm enough to lay out and read a book, but I also spent some time walking around the town, eating on the pier and enjoying ice cream.

Of course the sun came out in full force once I'd returned to Lisbon, but c'est la vie.  I spent the afternoon in the Alfama neighborhood, which was by far the most distinct area of Lisbon.  From Rick Steves' book, "the colorful sailors' quarter dates back to the age of Visigoth occupation from the 6th to 8th centures A.D.  This was a bustling district during the Moorish period, and eventually became the home of Lisbon's fishermen and mariners.  The Alfama's tangled street plan is one of the few features of Lisbon to survive the 1755 earthquake.  It helps make the neighborhood a clbbled playground of Old World color."  Today, it's mostly immigrant laborers that live in the area; laundry is hanging out many windows; and people spill out onto the stairs that wind through the labyrinth on a hill.  I definitely got my exercise for the day!

 

The hill was so steep going downhill that I practically slid down.  Apparently my sandals have no traction!  Lesson learned.  One bus ride back to the hotel, and I was able to spend the evening watching a Russian prison documentary.  Not sure why I find that kind of stuff so interesting.

I didn't have much left on my itinerary for the last day, so I decided to indulge myself a bit in things that are hard (impossible) to do with three kids in tow.  First, I found a massage place recommended on trip advisor.  I've never had a Thai massage before, but thought I'd give it a try.  It was definitely interesting, although I don't think I'll do it again.  

It started out strange when the lady asked me to undress and then lay down.  I've had enough massages in my life to know that's the point the masseuse usually steps out of the room to give some privacy.  But instead, she just stood there and kept chatting.  Through some awkward questioning, I got her to bring me an extra towel to maintain some sense of decency.  Pretty soon, even that little bit of decency was thrown out the window.  The Thai massage was unusual because it's done on a mat on the floor, with the masseuse running around the mat doing different contortion type moves.  A lot of it was relaxing, and we'll call the rest an interesting experience.  This picture makes the place seem really ghetto, but it wasn't bad.

Then I was walking to my next destination when I saw an empty salon. I poked my head in and found out a manicure was only 6 bucks.  Yes, please!  The lady did a super clean job, and it lasted 5 days without chipping.

Pampering over, I saw 'the pink street', which I read about on the internet as one of the most unique roads in the world.  Apparently it used to be a red light district, but after cleaning things up they painted the road to make it an appealing destination.  Of course when I got there it was blocked off because they'd just painted it, but it was pretty nonetheless.

I think when it comes to meals, people feel awkward about traveling alone.  But a good book and people watching keep me very entertained.  

After that, I was off to the airport, with plenty of time to spare.  Fortunately there was a lot of good shopping in the airport (and without inflated prices!) so I did some kids-free clothing shopping and came home with a few new outfits.

So overall: the trip was a huge success.  Every night I skyped with Hyrum, and we'd end up talking about all the cute things the kids did during the day.  I missed them, and of course only remembered the good things. It was a bit of a rude awakening to come home and listen to all the crying, but it was nice to see the three kiddos again.  (Although truth be told, Tiago wasn't nearly as excited to see me as I thought he would be!)  Hyrum survived just fine, although he only left the house with the kids twice in 4 days.  Sometimes it's just easier to stay at home.

I asked him how he thought the stay-at-home parent work compared with his Army work.  He said it's a lot more difficult, but a lot more fun and enjoyable. I thought that was a good summary.  It is a tough business to be home all day with little babies.  (Especially in this phase where they all love to cry at the same time!)  But it's enjoyable; Tiago loves to bring me book after book and sit on my lap just long enough to hear 2 or 3 pages.  And the girls are starting to smile and giggle every time someone gives them a little attention.  They still occasionally fall asleep in my arms and melt into my chest in a happy slumber.  I'd rather be at home with them than anywhere else... except for the occasional weekend getaway.  It was wonderful.